{"title":"Mugs for Lefties","description":"","products":[{"product_id":"boiling-the-ocean-since-2021-lefty","title":"\"Boiling the ocean since 2021\" (Lefty)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eYou're not even trapped in a meeting. You've been trapped in years of work that hasn't delivered. The project was supposed to \u003cem\u003etransform the business\u003c\/em\u003e. It has been re-scoped twice, re-named once, and survived two reorgs. The original sponsoring SVP has left. The new sponsoring VP wants to change the name and sell it as their idea. There is a kick-off next Tuesday — and you have been asked to bring fresh energy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis mug knows this. It knows you. It knows what you've been through, and it will say it for you with sarcasm and defiance.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e~\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch5\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eIt won't end the suffering. It won't get you out of Tuesday.\u003c\/h5\u003e\n\u003ch5\u003eBut, for less than a per-person offsite lunch budget, it will be something that actually ships (to you\u003cem\u003e)\u003c\/em\u003e.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\n\u003c\/h5\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58113393983752,"sku":"13372623700566011873","price":14.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1044\/5681\/4856\/files\/20260630122807-1f1747f2-62c5-64fe-83f6-da0245274ec3.png?v=1782822594"},{"product_id":"your-okrs-trigger-me-1","title":"\"Your OKRs trigger me\" (Lefty)","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eA document called \u003cem\u003eFY26 OKRs — Draft V7 (CONFIDENTIAL — DO NOT SHARE)\u003c\/em\u003e, with seventeen comments, fourteen of which are from the same VP asking for updates and metrics that don't actually exist.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eHe wants to know your progress on Objective 3, \u003cem\u003eImplement AI workflows in 78% of our processes\u003c\/em\u003e, which halted when the CFO locked down usage credits. Yet - there is a meeting in your calendar to align on it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eAt least you bought this mug, itching and ready to go on camera. Loud enough to be noticed, quiet enough they can pretend they didn't.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\" style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e~\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eIt's not going to fix Q4. It's not going to fix the document.\u003c\/h5\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eBut it might fix the crushing oppression on your soul.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\n\u003c\/h5\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58117213192456,"sku":"92098161344526007120","price":14.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1044\/5681\/4856\/files\/20260630123545-1f174803-7150-6ce2-b6e3-92f6eedf82ed.png?v=1782823262"},{"product_id":"i-havent-had-a-lunch-break-in-3-months-lefty","title":"\"I haven't had a lunch break in 3 months\" (Lefty)","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e12:47pm. You are in \u003cem\u003eQ4 Planning Workshop — Day 2 of 3\u003c\/em\u003e. Day 1 ran over by 90 minutes. Day 3 has tentative holds on three different afternoons.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eA consultant whose Zoom name is \u003cem\u003eKingsley \/ McKinsey\u003c\/em\u003e has been facilitating since 9am. He has used the word \u003cem\u003eunpack\u003c\/em\u003e eleven times. You have written \u003cem\u003eretention\u003c\/em\u003e on a virtual sticky note. The Head of Growth has also written \u003cem\u003eretention\u003c\/em\u003e. The VP has written \u003cem\u003eBe Bold\u003c\/em\u003e. Marcus says \u003cem\u003e\"this is going great.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eAt least this mug is on your side. Watching it happen. Saying what you can't.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\" style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e~\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eIt won't give you your lunch back. It won't give you your life back.\u003c\/h5\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eBut, for the cost of one-and-a-half Ubers, \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eit might be the most compassionate thing you bought yourself this financial year.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\n\u003c\/h5\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58117302124808,"sku":"41596017898225987088","price":14.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1044\/5681\/4856\/files\/20260630125156-1f174827-9c0f-646e-a977-6e6dbb8efcd5.png?v=1782823976"},{"product_id":"i-have-actual-work-to-do-lefty","title":"\"I have actual work to do\" (Lefty)","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eYou will be in another meeting tomorrow. Probably more than one. Someone will say \"vibes check.\" Someone else will say \"to your point.\" Someone will share a screen with a slide that's been copied from last year, and you will smile at the camera, and you will sip from this mug.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eA message on the front, camera-ready - loud enough to be seen, quiet enough not to get you on an HR list. \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eAnd something on the back, just for you.\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\" style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e~\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eIt's not going to fix the meeting. It's not going to fix the company.\u003c\/h5\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eBut, for the price of an office breakfast, it can be your maliciously compliant act for this quarter.\u003c\/h5\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58117268406536,"sku":"76207321024220924224","price":14.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1044\/5681\/4856\/files\/20260630124721-1f17481d-5b73-6662-b44f-9630b5c1865e.png?v=1782823794"},{"product_id":"i-have-another-meeting-lefty","title":"\"I have another meeting after this\" (Lefty)","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eA \u003cem\u003eQuick Sync \u003c\/em\u003eabout \u003cem\u003ealigning on language\u003c\/em\u003e for you and the team, which you've been told twice it \u003cem\u003eshouldn't take long\u003c\/em\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eThe new contractor Project Manager is presenting, reading out loud a Notion doc where they clarify the definition of \u003cem\u003eworkstream\u003c\/em\u003e vs \u003cem\u003eworkflow\u003c\/em\u003e. Apparently, there had been some disagreements.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eYou look at your calendar. You keep your mug close to your chest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\" style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e~\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eIt won't teach your company meeting-etiquette. \u003c\/h5\u003e\n\u003ch5 class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eBut, for much, much less than the price of an hour of these people's time, it has your back.\u003c\/h5\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58118001393928,"sku":"34409872723262875655","price":14.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1044\/5681\/4856\/files\/20260630140314-1f1748c6-f915-613c-9225-aaff3cb53f3d.png?v=1782828289"},{"product_id":"another-meeting-wont-fix-whatever-this-is-lefty","title":"\"Another meeting won't fix whatever this is\" (Lefty)","description":"\u003cp\u003eYou are 75 minutes into a meeting that was supposed to be 30. A Senior Director keeps describing the situation as \u003cem\u003ecomplex\u003c\/em\u003e and using the word \u003cem\u003elayers\u003c\/em\u003e. There has been a diagram. The diagram has been closed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA VP unmutes. She joined late. She says the next step is clear: \u003cem\u003e\"Let's get the right people in a room and really dig into this. A 90-minute working session next week should do. Can someone organise that?\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe mug feels warm in your hand, comforting you while telling them what they should know by now.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e~\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch5\u003eIt may not fix the mess. But there are things you can't say, and it can. And it can't wait.\u003c\/h5\u003e\n\u003cblockquote\u003e\u003c\/blockquote\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58118790119688,"sku":"36818743441367693955","price":14.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1044\/5681\/4856\/files\/20260630152721-1f174982-fabd-6590-97d1-6e22ab10a8a5.png?v=1782833536"}],"url":"https:\/\/pleasemuteyourself.com\/collections\/mugs-for-lefties.oembed","provider":"Please Mute Yourself","version":"1.0","type":"link"}